The Final Resort
by Constellation Temptation
Summary: Gideon has unlocked the power of the three journals, and has taken over the world. Now, the twins and the all knowing Bill Cipher have joined forces to take him down. But when all else fails, what is their final resort? Does it involve humor? I guarantee that it does! Is it surrender? Never! What will the trio try next?


Gideon has unlocked the powers of the journals, and is now unbeatable. The twins and a demon going by the name of Bill Cipher have joined forces to take him down, but there last few attempts all were in vain.

"What are we gonna do now? Magic doesn't work on Gideon anymore!" Dipper says, sitting on a log.

"I don't know. He's unbeatable!" Mabel agrees, sitting down next to Dipper.

"Look, we can try a new tactic this time." the demon said, trying to encourage the crestfallen twins.

"What can we do?" Dipper says, sounding defeated.

"I have an idea." Bill said, pulling the twins into a huddle. He whispered his plan to both of them.

"It's so crazy and insane, yet so simple that it might actually work!" Mabel cried out, her expression brightening instantly.

"It's a long shot. Think we can pull it off?" the boy asked.

"Our team consists of a smart boy, and happy girl, and an all knowing demon. What do you think?" Bill folded his arms.

"To the Mystery Shack!" Mabel shouted, shooting her fist up into the air, grappling hook in hand.

* * *

Gideon sat upon a turquoise throne, surveying the town. He had once again taken down the small group of resistance, but, yet again, they had escaped.

"Where are they?!" He shouted, hitting his fist against the arm of the throne he sat upon.

"We don't know sir. We've checked all over the forest and the dilapidated town. We can't find them anywhere!" a man said, trying not to quiver with fear.

"Looking for us?" Gideon heard a voice say. Everyone turned around to see a group of three. At the head of the group was a young boy in shorts, a vest, and wore a hat with a blue Pine Tree on it. To his left was a girl with braces, and a pink sweater, with a colorful Shooting Star on it. To his right was... a triangle? It had a tophat and a bowtie, with a single eye in it's center.

"You!" Gideon pointed to them. "Finally surrendering, huh?"

"What? Is that a joke?" Bill asked.

"Well, you might as well, seeing that you can't defeat me. Your magic won't work on- huh... what is that in your hand?" Gideon asked, pointing to the strange object.

"I have no idea, but Bill thought it would be useful." Dipper shrugged.

"Grunkle Stan calls it the world's most distracting object!" Mabel laughed. Dipper pulled the string on the strange thing.

"You really think cheap old things from the Mystery Shack will stop me?! You are all fools to even think that such a thing could possibly- ...um, what was I just yelling about?" the nine year old boy asked, scratching his head.

"Uh... taxes?" Dipper shrugged.

"Oh, well, that seems legit. Dang taxes!" Gideon shook a fist in the air. "Also, prepare to face my wrath!" his hands began to glow with a dull green light.

"Grappling hook!" Mabel shouted as the pushed down the trigger on her gun looking weapon.

"Grappling what now?" Gideon asked before getting hit in the stomach with the metal hook. "Ow!" he yelled, gripping his sides in pain.

"Behold! The rock that looks like a face rock!" Bill said dramatically before "Accidentally" dropping it on Gideon's foot. "Whoops." the triangle shrugged innocently.

"Yow!" the big-haired kid screamed.

"And now, behold! The "Mysterious Sack of Mystery"! When you put your enemies in, they mysteriously disappear!" Dipper threw the enlarged sack over Gideon.

"Hey! Who turned out the lights?!" he shouted, squirming inside the sack.

"And now, for tonight's final illusion, we have my personal favorite, mostly because it destroyed stuff, we have the dangerous, the terrible, and a down right hideous beast! Dipper, Mabel, release the Gremloblin!" the twins pulled at a rope, and a giant cloth was lifted off, revealing a big cage with iron bars. Inside was the ugly creature. The front of the cage fell away, leaving a huge gap. The beast launched itself out, and lunged for the sack.

Warning: This next part is censored so you won't have to see the horrible things the Gremloblin did to Gideon, who was still trapped in the sack of Mystery.

"Wow, I can't believe that actually worked!" Dipper yelled over the screams of Gideon.

"I know! It was really fun too!" Mabel said smiling.

"So, you wanna go see what's on TV since we just won and set the world free?" Bill asked.

"Yeah, OK."

"Alright."

"My favorite part's the theme song."

**So, how did you like this quick one-shot? Please leave a review! :)**


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